Reflections: Mary and Joseph

The following is a prayer and a few thoughts that I wrote out to the Lord while waiting to teach in one of my classes. The story of Jesus’ birth has never hit me in such an impactful way like it has in the last few weeks, and the Holy Spirit used the faith of Mary and Joseph to totally redirect my focus and emotions concerning the will of God for my life. This is straight from my prayer journal, and I want to share it with you.

“I want to leave a faith story behind me. [Check out Joshua 4:1-9] Sometimes I want so desperately to know what Your plan is for me, but I realize that I will never know faith until I have the chance to test it and grow in it. I want to be able to look back and say, “I trusted God with this situation and He did this.” I want to have a testimony in the end of His grace, goodness, and love.

Taipei with some of the "fam bam."

“Mary had no idea what was going to happen to her when she stepped by faith into the calling the angel had for her. She had no clue what was to happen to her. She just knew she was stopped in her tracks and re-directed another way. It could have meant death. It could have meant a life alone and rejected. But instead, You had a plan of LIFE; yes, hard work, but LIFE and GLORY.

“And Joseph! He must have felt as if he was pulled into a plan that was not his own. It must have been hard to think of this turn of events as God’s plan and not “Mary’s fault.” That man must’ve known his God. He must have had to think and CHOOSE to stand by his betrothed- the woman he chose to make him happy- no matter what. He had no clue what his future held. All he knew at that point was that his reputation would never be the same. He was willing to lay down who he was for God’s glory and out of obedience.

“God, You knew. Even this(!!!): Joseph never saw Your ultimate fulfillment of Your plan for Jesus. He must have constantly doubted as it seemed that Jesus just grew to be a good, well-respected man. He probably wondered if all that was even worth it. And Mary! She was obedient all her life to the hand and will of God and then her Son is CRUCIFIED as a low-class criminal. She must have felt like dirt….I know I would. How heartbreaking for a mother.

View from the Taipei IBLP Office.

“BUT, You were directing things outside of their heartbreak and confusion. Plans SO MUCH bigger than either of them could have imagined. They never saw the fulfillment of this glory and ultimate plan…but it happened anyways. Because this man and this woman were willing to do all and anything God asked of them- with no reservations- the plight of ALL MANKIND was (and is) forever changed.

“…Mary probably never saw the fulfillment of her obedience. Joseph definitely never did. Yet they obeyed.

“So…what am I willing to do? Am I willing to simply obey day-by-day; not asking questions because even Mary did not see the fulfillment of the promise? Abraham didn’t see the full impact of his obedience. Moses didn’t. Noah didn’t…ish. These people trusted and obeyed throughout their lives but never received the complete fulfillment of the promise made to them by the Lord. They had no idea their obedience would echo so high and far throughout generations and ages. Therefore, who am I to question You!? Who am I to “seek and find” Your plan and will instead of Your heart? That’s not right or fair. Shouldn’t I just follow and love? You always show me and give me exactly what I’ll need- never too early or too late. You reveal in Your perfect timing, and You don’t reveal in your perfect timing.

“Step by step I am led. You hold things back until your plan is ready to be carried out in my life. You reveal when Your plan is ready.

“Teach me Your ways, oh Lord. You are so good. Thank you. Amen.” (12/13/2011)

“Then Mary said, ‘Behold the maidservant of the Lord! Let it be to me according to your word.’ And the angel departed from her.” (Luke 1:38)

Ninteenth birthday dinner at Chili's
in Taipei.

Dear You,

Wow, there are so many people I would like to sit down with right now and share the following random things that have been on my heart. Sigh. I guess this "mass letter" to you all will have to suffice... So much to tell...not enough time.

Lol, this was Day 1 of being sick at school. I had to wear one
of these annoying things

First of all, thank you to all those who prayed for me throughout that sickness a couple weeks back. It turned out being an upper chest/throat viral infection that escalated to a way worse problem than it should have ever been. After day four of the progressively worsening fever and congestion, some dear friends took me into the Emergency Room where I was on IV for the duration of the day. 'Twas no fun, but knowing people were praying for me was enough to remind me that I was loved and helped me stay somewhat sane. Thank you: our God always answers prayer in His timing and according to His perfect will. :)

My beloved Jingmen family and our Thanksgiving feast.

The university Christmas event is happening next week! The plan is to have a "Christmas bazaar" for the first hour, then the Nativity story shared in drama form, the Gospel presented by our pastor, and then finishing the night up with caroling around the campus. I've taken responsibility to head it up and organize the details so please be praying for both diligence and flexibility for me. During this season, I tend to get so easily distracted with "busy work" that isn't the ultimate best use of my time and, not only that, I also tend to be quite the perfectionist. This combination definitely has the potential to keep me away from glorifying the Lord with the time I have.

Also, next week is the IBLP TESOL Christmas retreat in Taipei! It should be an awesome time of fun and fellowship with the other teams in Taiwan. Can't believe we're celebrating Christmas again already! I heard as you get older, the years go by faster and faster.....I think I'm actually starting to believe that now. C'est la vie, mais 生活是美好的。<-- Hope Google Translate hasn't failed me with that last part. ;)

Jake: One of my absolute favorites.

I don't quite know what I want to do with my life next year- whether to stay here in Jingmen, or go back to the States, or go somewhere else, or study, or not study, or intern somewhere, or not...etc. This is something I've thought about quite intensively the last couple weeks and I have decided to make no decision in this area for a while. Lol. It's really hard not to be swayed by those I love at home...or those I love here. I want my life to be guided by my Heavenly Father's leading, not by the desires of others or my own. This is something that would be awesome to get some prayer for. I feel urgency to come to some kind of conclusion in the near future; and I want to have God's perfect will and not get in the way.

On that note, its been a roller coaster of emotions as of recently as far as missing my family, friends, and the community back home. I think with Thanksgiving barely past and Christmas coming up, the desire to be home with my family during this season becomes sharper and more acute. I hate the fact that I'm missing my brothers and sisters growing up and I so desperately don't want to drop out of many people' lives. I know members of my team are dealing with the same thing so if you have the time and think of it, it would be a blessing to know that you're also praying for us in this area.

Adorable Debra. I love 1st Grade!

Lastly, I couldn't finish a prayer update without mentioning my conquering of the Mandarin obstacle. It's definitely a challenge because of the necessary investion of time and effort to show progress. When I hear about past Jingmen team members who have grasped this language within a year, I feel discouraged and inadequate and I know this is something that is going to require both the Lord's wisdom and His grace. Remember way back at the beginning of this letter, when I asked for you to pray for me for diligence and flexibility? Those character traits would be helpful here too... ;) 

I apologize for the random spattering of prayer requests and updates....pray all is well with you all and that you are blessed as you prepare to celebrate the birth of our Lord.

Many blessings and much love,
Christina

I love these kids. The boy with the intense makeup is Green.
He had just finished his big dance performance...and for
that reason you can guess how much I love him<3